“Show me a perfect mother and I’ll show you a leprechaun, riding a unicorn, over a double rainbow, with a fairy holding a pot of gold at the end of it.” – www.domesticatedmomster.com
Since the moment my daughter made her way into this world, I have been trying to be the perfect mom. I have tried to not make any mistakes, always keep my cool, make the best choices and give her a perfect childhood.
And guess what? I haven’t been able to do any of those things.
I have made more mistakes than I can count on two hands and two feet in the six years she has been alive.
I am embarrassed to admit that I yell way more than I want to and have a very hard time keeping my cool.
I have made poor choices and prioritized the wrong things at times.
Our life is not perfect and her childhood is not perfect either.
But I have learned something that has changed the way I parent, and that is that there is no such thing as a perfect mom. We all make mistakes and we all have moments we regret.
Just this morning in fact, my daughter was screaming at me because I wouldn’t let her wear winter gloves to school. Yes, gloves in June. And instead of keeping calm and being the adult in the situation, what did I do? I yelled back at her. Not a very proud mom moment right there.
Before we left for school however, I sat her down and apologized for yelling back at her. She apologized to me for getting to upset. We hugged, told each other “I love you” and all was okay in the world again.
Now that moment? That is one I am proud of.
You will never do everything right. Ever. You will not always say the right thing. You will have moments you wish you could undo.
So no, you are not perfect. But do you know how I know you are a great mom?
Because you keep trying.
You wake up each and every day and you do the best you can. You may stumble along the way, join the club! But does that mean you give up? Absolutely not.
You show up for those kids of yours and that, mama, makes you incredible. Seriously.
There have been so many days where I felt like such a failure. Like I have done so many things wrong and want to start over. But then, I look into the eyes of my little girl, and realize that I am doing an okay job.
Do you know what the most powerful thing in the world is? The way your baby’s face lights up when you walk into the room. The pictures that your daughter draws you that says “I love you.” The way your son looks up to you and can’t wait to tell you about his day.
Because to them, you ARE perfect. You are their mommy and that, has always been enough.
So rest easy mama. Give yourself a break. None of us are perfect and we are all screwing up.
But please, promise me one thing. Promise me you will never give up. Ever. No matter what. Always keep trying.
From one imperfect mom to another, you got this.